Sorry for Disappearing

I do that sometimes, disappear. Sorry. But, I'm here now. I haven't felt like I had anything of any interest to post. I figure I can't just keep staying in the dark though, so I will fill everyone in on what has been happening in my life anyway. School I start my practicum this semester. [...]

Hugs in Therapy

Today was a day of therapy. I saw K at 1 today. We talked a lot about my different parts. She said she wanted to keep things simple today. She reassured me that I did a good job talking through things today and that I felt less resistant in session today than I have in [...]

Group and My Spirit Animal

Last week in group we did a visualization at the end. We were to imagine ourselves in a forest. And to imagine a guide. I saw a buck. We were asked, as homework, to do something to connect with our guide. I drew mine (and colored it while at work; I get to do that, [...]

Another EMDR session

Tuesday I saw H, the therapist who is covered by my insurance. She was nice. She seemed smart. But, I chose not to make a follow-up appointment. I know I could be saving a lot of money every month but it means something to me that K tries so hard to make sure my needs [...]

Asking for what we need

I had therapy with K yesterday. I was going to tell her that it had to be our last session, that I couldn't afford anymore. But then, she just said and did all the right things. I couldn't walk away. So, we set an appointment for 3 weeks from now, when I should have money [...]

Experiences of Synchronicity

Wednesday, my therapy day, was quite unusual. There isn't any way my words will do justice to the events of the day but I'm still going to try. The best way I can describe the day is through the notion of Synchronicity. This is basically Carl Jung's fancy explanation for those strange coincidences that feel [...]

A lot of change…

Again, it has been a while since I've written. I think the last I checked in, it was on the J thing (me trying to persuade her to have me for individual). Her first response was via phone, so I couldn't share that. But, after some deep soul searching I realized what I needed from [...]

Broken Heart

Well, J called me yesterday at 1:30PM and told me that she didn't think it was ethical to agree to be my individual therapist. I expected that to be the answer but I had hope that she would be different. My heart is broken. She is just another person, in a string of people, who [...]

Finally, Fighting for Myself

So, I’ve said I don’t know how many times on here that I really wish that I could do individual therapy with J, that I trust her and feel a sense of security with her and that she gets me. Blah, blah. All the good things. But, it was complicated because I am working K, [...]

An Ambien Stupor

Oh my goodness! Last night I took two ambien, instead of my usual one, because my brain wasn't cooperating. Let me tell you all about the things I have since discovered doing while in my stupor: 1) I ate all the cookies in the apartment 2) I ate half a bag of chips 3) I [...]